No More “Outstanding”: So How Are We Supposed to Value Our Houses Now?!
For decades, we’ve trusted one unlikely organisation to influence the UK housing market more than estate agents, mortgage lenders, or even Kirstie and Phil.
That’s right: Ofsted.
🏠 “Good school nearby” = +£15,000 on your house
🏠 “Outstanding” school? That’s a property jackpot.
But now, as of this November, the game is changing. The Department for Education’s very own TripAdvisor is ditching the beloved one-word ratings — “Outstanding”, “Good”, “Requires Improvement”, and “Inadequate” — and introducing a multi-area report card system instead.
Goodbye Labels, Hello Confusion
So what are we left with? A more detailed breakdown of school performance across up to 11 separate categories, covering everything from curriculum to attendance to safeguarding.
Great for nuance. Terrible for house-hunting.
Because let’s be honest: no one scanning Rightmove at 11:30 pm with a glass of wine wants to decipher a multi-page PDF on Key Stage 2 outcomes. They just want to see:
✅ Outstanding = Buy the house
❌ Requires Improvement = Keep scrolling
And estate agents? They’re now going to have to earn their money by… actually explaining things.
“This property is located within walking distance of a school with excellent curriculum planning, above-average attendance, and strong leadership in safeguarding—though outcomes for disadvantaged pupils are slightly below the national average.”
Zzzzzzzzz.
The New Age of Playground Property Politics
Let’s not forget the social fallout either. Imagine the horror at coffee mornings when one parent says,
“We moved to be near an Outstanding school.”
and another has to respond with,
“Oh, our school is… um, very strong in leadership and behaviour, but we’re working on curriculum consistency and post-16 pathways.”
It just doesn’t have the same ring, does it?
Expect awkward silences, sudden changes of topic, and frantic attempts to redirect the conversation to phonics schemes or Ofsted’s font choice.
So What Do We Do Now?
Honestly? It might not be the worst thing.
This shift aims to alleviate some of the intense pressure that comes with being defined by a single word. It may even encourage parents to look beyond a simplistic label and consider the full picture. Radical, I know.
But still. Spare a thought for the thousands of property listings now in urgent need of a rewrite. Or the school website managers frantically replacing “Rated Good by Ofsted” banners with a summary table nobody asked for.
Or me, for that matter, trying to decide whether my semi-detached is still worth its weight in safeguarding.
In Summary:
The one-word school rating is dead.
The era of Ofsted-fuelled postcode panic might just be coming to an end.
But don’t worry, your house is still worth whatever someone’s willing to pay for it.
Especially if it’s within 0.3 miles of a really friendly lollipop person and a Co-op.